Oh my god, it has been so long.  My little girl is four months old and things are going pretty swimmingly these days.  We did have quite a difficult time in the first few months with her weight gain, or lack of it.  She has been exclusively breastfed since birth, apart from about 2o ml of formula given in hospital when my nipples felt like they where falling apart and I was falling apart from sleep deprivation.  It took a while for her to gain much weight, in fact I think it took 6 weeks for her to get back to her birth-weight but after about 2 months it all sorted itself out.  She is still small, but perfectly formed and developing normally.

She started smiling at 6 weeks and was smiling lots by 10 weeks.  Rolling over, or nearly rolling over is the latest thing, she can get almost all the way but cant quite get her arms over, I predict that she will be rolling from front to back before the weekend.  Of course then will come the next problem, she will not be able to get back and she is not too fond of extended tummy time.  She also loves to practice standing up and it makes her smile more than anything else at the moment.

Baby things aside, our life has been dominated with the search for a house to buy, we found somewhere.  A repossessed place in Plymouth and in less than one week we went from seeing the place, putting an offer in and having it accepted and getting the solicitors involved and then just as we had started to make great plans as to what walls we where going to bash down and even having arguments over it, we got gazumped at the end of the week.  We where totally gutted but got over it pretty quickly as we found something that was, in my opinion much better and we are in the process of buying that now, just waiting for the solicitors to do their thing.

I have been finding very little time to do anything reciently apart from look after my little girl.  I guess this is normal for the parents of a newborn baby but it is amazing how one new little person can totally dominate the lives of her parents.  At present she is asleep on her fathers chest and subsequently I have two hands to type with.

Life kinda follows a vague routine all based around the 10 or so breast feeds that Eva needs but as I am feeding on demand everything varies and life can’t be planned that much.  Mind you I have been discovering these past few days that you can do quite a lot with an infant in a pushchair, especially in the mornings when she is at her most chilled.  Yesterday I spent quite a few hours mooching around the shops in the nearest town, having a takeaway lunch on the seafront in the sun, only having to move the pushchair occasionally to keep Eva chilled.  She was even quiet on our brief visit to the library, much to my amazement.

not-long-after-her-birth-back-up-on-the-delivery-suiteWell my laxness in posting has an excuse for once.  A little under 4 weeks ago my baby girl was born by elective c-section.

I had never planned her birth as a c-section, but as after a month or two with every midwife not being entirely sure how my baby was lying I was sent for a presentation ultrasound scan at 38 weeks and found that the hard bit that I could feel at the top of my bump was in fact a head and not a bottom as had been thought.   I was then to come back for what is called a ECV which is where, in my case a consultant obstetrician attempts to push the baby into a better position, in my case it didn’t work  but it was worth a try.  I was then booked for an elective c-section 6 days before my due date.

Then went a week of worry both on the part of my partner, myself and my family.  My man is not at all comfortable with anything to do with the medical profession so for him to accept that his child was going to be born via a surgical procedure was pretty difficult for him.

The 8th April was the date booked and hence my daughters birthday, it would probably had been a few days later but the start of the Easter holidays (good Friday on the 10th specifically) hurried it all up a bit.  As always the anticipation of the event was far worse than the event itself. I had spent the previous few days pretty much shitting myself about the prospect of impending surgery but probably the most painful part was the insertion of the IV cannula and this was with a local anaesthetic too.

The theatre team where all very friendly and tried to put both myself and my partner at ease, we where even allowed to play a CD that I had burnt for the occasion (it killed a few hours the night before figuring out which tracks to play).  I was all gowned up and my man was wearing theatre scrubs and a hat (he looked pretty cute in it).  The spinal anaesthetic was the first thing to happen, I sat on the operating table bending forwards over a pillow to open up my spine and the anaesthetist injected me with a local anaesthetic and I was then tilted on one side and then the next to allow it to travel to all the required areas and after that I couldn’t feel any pain and couldn’t move a muscle below my chest, I could feel lots of pushing and pulling though which was very odd as it was inside my tummy.

After they had established that the spinal block was effective using some ice to check the level of the block the drape went up.  This was the most nerve-wrecking part for me as once they had started I knew it wouldn’t hurt but just before, well I just didn’t know. It was wonderful to have my man in the theatre with me to hold my hand and reassure me, even when I’m sure he was shitting it himself.

After that I just remember holding my man’s hand knowing that they where cutting me open but I couldn’t feel it and then after a bit of pushing and pulling we where told that they baby was out, time of birth ten to three and that she was a girl and a few minutes later a little bundle covered in white goo was put on my chest and Eva had arrived.  It then took a little while, half an hour or so to put me all back together again and then our little family was taken back to the delivery suite where I fed my little girl for the first time, not easy to get into a good position when unable to move from the chest downwards but with some help managed to feed her on and off for an hour.  We where then taken to the postnatal ward where Eva and I stayed for a couple of days.

This post has taken days to write, I am finding that I am getting very little time with both arms free to type anything so I am guessing blog posts will be short for a while.  Being a mother has completely taken over my life, as I am sure it does to almost all new mums.  It is a weird thought that my life is no longer my own, but its not as scary as I would have found it before she was born.  I have totally fallen in love with my little girl, kinda wasnt expecting it to be as powerful as it is but I am sure there is a whole heap of chemicals in my system at least partially responsible for that.

It has been wonderful weather today, and I am so glad that I have chosen this week for me to start my maternity leave as it has been just perfect.  I spent this morning pottering a bit and planting some seeds in the garden with mum (parsley and rocket) and generally enjoying the sunshine and the afternoon was spent going for a leisurely walk with my man, down to the river and enjoying even more sunshine.

I have got less than a month till my due date now and the preparations are nearly complete.  I have been washing all the baby cloths that I bought and was given, with soap flakes that where salvaged from my aunts house and are probably about 20 years old, but I’m sure they are pretty unchanged.  It was a weird feeling to be hanging a load of baby-grows out on the line. 

I went and visited my local library in Teignmouth for the the first time in years the other day.  My motivation was simple, I had pretty much read all of the books in my parents house that I hadn’t read before and reread a few old favourites and as I have a bit more time on my hands at the moment needed some more reading matter.

I got a few, almost all light reading including Jonathan Ross’s new one which I demolished in a little over 24 hrs.  It was very much like listening to his general chatter for a few hours, pretty funny but not intelectually challenging (quite a good think as I have a definite case of baby brain at the moment).

Only six more weeks until the big day, not that babies come on time very often but as the due date is the only indicator I have at the moment, its what I’m sticking with.  I am coming to the end of a lovely four full days off work and I feel exhausted, not that I have done anything.  I guess it is just that time when doing anything feels like hard work as I am carrying round a sizeable bump.

My man and I where planning to check out the property auction in Plymouth today but when we got there, which was about 10 minutes before it started, we where told that the room was jam packed and they where not letting anybody else in until some people came out.  As there where already about 40 people hanging around in the foyer and plenty more people trying to find somewhere to park we gave it up as a bad job and left.  We then had a little drive around Plymouth to get some idea as to how good or bad some of the areas where instead.

Well it seems to be a good time to resurrect this blog. I have been back in the UK for a few months now having travelling around India and Central America ( See my travel blog, Charlie’s Travels) and have abandoned blogging since then.

I returned home in the beginning of September mainly because I discovered that I was pregnant, which kind of explained why I had a huge urge to go home from around late July. 

Currently I am 33 weeks pregnant and due on the 14th of April and intend to use this blog as an account of trying to bring up a baby.  I intend to reintroduce my yoga and running as appropriate and possible. 

Just relating this to the previous post from around this time last year, my hip injury lasted for a while and I have not ran successfully since, but that has more to do with and extended period of travel and then pregnancy so I guess time will tell.

Whilst surfing the net this evening I found this collection of very inspirational and sometimes moving quotes on capture.create. They come from a wide variety of sources from Oprah to George Bernard Shaw and seem to have a bias towards the artistic community.

My personal favourite is this one:
Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life. Don’t be trapped by dogma – which is living with the results of other people’s thinking. Don’t let the noise of other’s opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.
Steve Jobs

I really should go and see a physiotherapist as my hip has not improved one bit. I haven’t ran since I last posted in fact I have pretty much given up on the whole thing.

I have been focused on other things. Namely planning my trip to India in about a month. I have been neglecting this blog to start a new one at Charlie’s Travels for my upcoming trip to India and this has got me to backup all my photos from the last trip and post them on there, all backdated, and mainly for my sake. I have also got myself a Flikr pro account and have been backing up all of my photos as I kinda like the idea that I can check out all of my photos from anywhere in the world.

Anyway I’m not sure how much I will be posting on here for the next while but I will be posting there relatively frequently.

Well I am back to the world of running again, but still with a bit of trepidation. I have still been getting some soreness from my left hip after a long day at work and if I go for a long walk but I have been getting a strong urge to run again. Anyway I decided as it has been nearly 3 months since I have ran really I will start back very carefully using the C25K plan, as I used this plan to start my running last spring. I did a week one run (1 minute running with 90 seconds running) and found it too easy so next run I am going to try a week 3 run as during this run, I didn’t stop for one walking period and ended up running 3.5 minutes and that wasn’t too hard so I know I can do that. So far, my hip feels no worse than after a day at work but I have made sure that I have been stretching it.

Find me on Twitter @CharlotteBurt

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